Never thought it’d happen to me. It did. Been Clean a bit over a year. I got a couple crazy stories for sure. AMA

Edit: this is pretty personal, the answers kinda long, and I can’t touch on everything, but I’ll try my best. Thanks for reading.

  • RandomDude@lemmy.caEnglish
    1·
    1 year ago

    First off, congrats on being clean! Such a huge accomplishment! I’m going to ask a few questions: -How did you start? -What was your rock bottom moment? -What was the convincing factor that made you get clean?

    • MiddleWeigh@lemmy.worldOPEnglish
      1·
      1 year ago

      That means a lot to me fr.

      For how I started read the post after yours (:

      My rock bottom? Hell there’s no such thing. The bottom just keeps moving. Eviction? No electricity? Starving? Nope I found a way. Multiple arrests and charges? Nope. No money? I sold lots of my precious music gear. Nope. Sold my SOs great aunts wedding rings from the 20s was pretty bad…but:

      This is my most “wtf am I doing” moment. And I’d consider it rock bottom. It’s not crazy, but it’s something I’m super ashamed about and would never do if not for drugs. Stealing. I got fired from my job because I was taking tools and pawning them, then returning them when I could get them out. …

      Well one day a coworker just happened to be in this run down little pawn shop. He caught me. He didn’t tell on me until a week later, I suffered like raskalinov that entire time about my guilt and getting found out. I was a mess.

      My job was awesome too with awesome people. They were gonna put me through rehab! But I just walked out before my boss even got to the job to talk to me and haven’t talked any of them since, all driven by shame and embarrassment.

      In the end, it wasn’t enough. I used for another 6 or 7 years. It took me doing jail time. Something light, only 90 days. But that was simultaneously the worst and best thing that ever happened to me. I made the best of jail, laughed a LOT, lived in raw human sewage for a week with no running water, ate shitty food and talked to some shitty and some cool af people. Never looked back. I know that if fuck up even a little bit, I’m going right back. I’m not on parole anymore but I’m in the system. Everytime I get pulled over I get searched, cuffed, and put in the squad car. I have to be air tight. Especially where I live.