Everything will remind me of him. It’s just for a day, but knowing me, I’ll be devastated. Even when he says “don’t be sad”, even when it’s for our mental health. Even when it’s for the best, I’ll still miss him.

I would start crying if i thought of him or him hugging me. I’m thinking about it right now. I know it’s something I can’t have. Even for that day.

Everything is affecting me so strongly, it feels more like a break-up than a one-day break. Even when I can still text him sometimes, even when I help him and allow him to do what he wants.

I’m scared one day, he’ll start to see I’m a bad, mentally-ill girlfriend and break up and think ill of me. Maybe he won’t, maybe he’ll support me and love me, though, i hope so.

I feel like sometimes, he will leave me even when he says “I’ll always be here”. Maybe I’ll push him away. Maybe I have already.