This is an automated archive made by the Lemmit Bot.

The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/HuckleberryGlum1163 on 2023-09-25 12:56:17.

10 years ago, my mother bought our house. She was recently divorced, so she said she would prefer not to have the masters bedroom, and said it was between me and my sister on who gets the biggest room. I told my younger sister that she could have it, I wouldn’t mind getting a smaller room.

Jump to 2022 my younger sister said she wanted to move out, I had told her multiple times that she should just stay with us and keep her money (2200 for a room). She went on and got an apartment with 3 of her sorority sisters back from college (6000 total).

When she left, I naturally moved into the big room. I told her, and she seemed “okay” with it. But she gave me a “stipulation” that I was not allowed to touch her stuff, and for the most part she still has many clothes and items here, it is more or less a storage unit.

She had been living with them for about 3 months when she decided to visit us, when she saw me sleeping in the bed, she told me to get out of “her” room. She told me she wants to stay in the room for the rest of the day, as she feels exhausted being in her new apartment and that she doesn’t get privacy (she does have her own room in the apartment, but she tells me she feels like she needs to keep her room open, as it is rude to not make conversations and greet the other girls, so she feels like she is always conversing and it makes her tired)

I remember rolling over and telling her she can sleep beside me, but that I didn’t want to move.

This led to a huge argument. She said she feels that she has no place to call home now, and all she was asking was for me to get out of “ her room “ for a couple of hours where she can “de stress” alone. I told her she can stay in the room with me, but that it is now “my room.” She insisted I still leave. And that she would do this a couple times a month, and that I could have the room back when she is finished. She insisted I was being unreasonable as I could have the room all the other times she is not here and she is at her apartment.

Usually I’m very kind to my younger sister but this type of “argument” really annoyed me. I explained that she willingly left this house, that I explained to her multiple times to stay to save money, that she had a “home” but that she decided to leave. When she left she left ownership of this room, and that if I wanted to stay in my room, she would be allowed to come and stay as much as she wants. But her telling me to leave and wait, and decide for me on a dime when I can and cannot go in the room, was a big hell no for me.

We haven’t talked much since, it’s been a year and other then small talk, we haven’t really spoken.

AITA?

  • intensely_human@lemm.ee
    1·
    9 months ago

    Notice how 100% of the warnings given to this younger sister were about money. As usual, literally nobody ever sat her down to explain the energy dynamics of being an introvert and how that is affected by having roommates.

    Now she’s facing a situation she only has one way to deal with, without developing stress-related illnesses and mental health issues, and her sister is treating her with the same level of warmth and care as two strangers arguing over a fender bender.

    YTA. Give your sister a couple hours to recharge. She’ll eventually get her own system for this worked out, but not if her legs are cut out from under her. She’s your sister not a goblin from another dimension.