i live in a small 1 bedroom apartment with my partner and we have 1 kitty at home. he’s about 2 yrs old, we got him a year ago from the shelter. over the past year, it’s become pretty obvious that kitty has some overstim behaviors (whipping tail, dilated pupils, etc before nipping). this is not the issue, i have since started working at a shelter myself and understand the signs/cues pretty well to give him his space.

the main issue is the BITE bites. when i get home from work, get up in the morning, or move between the bedroom/living room (our kitchen is in between), there is about a 50-60% chance our cat will lunge and grab/bite my calf. at first it would just sting a little and he would not apply much pressure. over the last few months, he has broken skin a few times and has continued to try and get at me again when previously it would be an isolated nip then done. sometimes, the bite is preceded by headbutts/figure 8s between my legs, but not always. most of the time it’s bite first, THEN headbutts/rubbing up on me.

i’ll go over the things i’ve already tried. main advice from people i work with is to ignore him and make myself uninteresting. they’ve also said to try making noise that signals it hurts. these were both methods i tried over the course of several months, with no notable progress. my sister also advised a spray bottle. as much as i hate that option, i did try that as well but it quickly became obvious that he would only stop if the bottle was within his view and that made me sad.

my partner does not experience this, only me. we are both men and we interact with him very similarly. it is worth noting that i am kitty’s primary caregiver. i feed him his meals and play with him (i’ve asked my partner to play with him daily since he gets home first and he still hasn’t, but that’s another issue for another time). it has occurred to me that he might just be bored and asking to play, so if thats the consensus i’d love some suggestions for toys he can play with home alone and not hurt himself so he’s not biting/desperate for play as soon as i get home.

also - I CANNOT GET A SECOND CAT RIGHT NOW trust me i know that would be the ultimate solution but it’s simply not in the cards due to housing so please don’t remind me.