Let me give the background. We have had her for 3 years, and it first happened a month after moving to our new apartment.

She did not handle the move well. And she is really strangely anxious about anything or anybody unfamiliar. Essentially she hates all except me and my wife and her sister cat, who she sometimes disagrees with but overall they are chill.

After the move she would lay lethargically and not come out. I put her by her litter box the first day to show her, and then I went to work for 8 hours. I got home, and there she is…laying in her completely clean and brand new litter box, like the world is ending. Treats, lasers, neon worm/feather on fishing pole, none of if had impact. Normally she is like OH HELL YEAH.

Okay, so finally she adjusts, and then holidays hit and we are going out of town a lot. When we leave and come back the spot by her tail/butt is bigger and worse. We tried taking her with us, but she was terrified and doing it more. And during the holidays it got the most bad.

We take her to vet, twice. So I get it everyone says take her to the vet, no duh, but the problem is they say it’s not allergies, it’s not skin condition, they say she does it out of anxiety and give us gabapentin and some other medicine like a cat Prozac.

It truthfully doesn’t matter what it is, because the act of giving it to her at all is a nightmare. We can successfully get her to take it it’s not that hard. The problem is is that she will then hide all day and lay lethargically like she did when we moved, and she acts like she has been given some horrible punishment.

It’s like I’m not sure which is worse, the anxiety that she naturally feels, or the obvious detriment she seems to feel whenever she’s forced to swallow the pill.

We bought spray and put it on her butt, but she will just lick it off. She will not give a shit now nasty it is, she is determined to lick and chew her butt.

Has anyone experienced this? I hear there is something you can rub into their ears? Any success from anyone?