PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF THIS IS AGAINST THE RULES–I WILL STOP IF SO BUT DON’T BAN ME OUTRIGHT

I have been harness training the cat because the poor guy is so bored and wants to play all the time and we were at the park and a guy jogged by and cat bolted. So now he’s alone at a park with a harness and a leash on. Yes, I looked for him for quite some time. I’m kind of angry at him, not for running initially, and I do blame myself for not holding the leash tight, but for not coming back while I was looking for him. I went home and I’m going back in a couple hours. I feel angry at myself for not being attentive enough and at him for running off and not responding for me. Part of me is like fuck it, if he wants to go so badly then fine, you do you since you want to so badly. But he has a leash and a harness attached to him, unless he got it off, so he’s even more vulnerable to predators. I’m vacillating between being mad at the cat, mad at myself, sad, and apathetic. I miss my therapist.

If this kind of personal diary entry style post is discouraged on here please lmk and I will clean up my act.