Some background - I am diagnosed with autism and it can be hard for me to just “ignore” the awful things people can say to me when I’m online.

The latest thing someone said to me really got me feeling down and depressed. Honestly having darker thoughts because of it.

I have IBS-D, which means there is an insane amount of food I cannot eat - if I do eat the things I cannot, my intestines get shredded and I bleed like crazy. Honestly the list is massive and my diet has basically been chicken green beans and potatoes every night for the past 3 years. I have lost over 60 lbs, and currently weigh 130lbs as a 5.11 male. Doctors have been trying to figure it out but they haven’t been able to and say I may just have to live with it.

This person was calling me a monster because I eat meat, even though I have a medical condition that makes my diet extremely limited. Unfortunately meat is one of the only things that agrees with my stomach across the board. I’d like to be vegetarian but I literally will die from malnutrition and weight loss if I did try. I explained this to the user but they didn’t care.

I explained my autism to them, and that what they were saying was making me depressed and they just continued with saying how I was a monster and killing myself wouldn’t be as bad as killing all the animals I have to “enjoy” meat. They said my condition wasn’t an excuse and compared me to the “sexual cycle of violence” of dracula.

This user made me feel really sad and crappy. Afterwards I cried for a while but I don’t feel better.

The problem I have is that there are many people online who seem to get pleasure from being awful to others, and it gets to me every time.

Does anyone have any advice for handling these situations online? Often I hear people say you should just ignore these people and move on, but I end up ruminating on what they’ve said and it can make me feel bad for weeks on end. Sometimes I feel like I should just give up using the internet because of these people.

  • russjr08@outpost.zeuslink.net
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    1 year ago

    Hi OP, just to start - I have Crohn’s Disease which shares a lot of parallels to what you have, including the fact that I have a very small list of things that I can reasonably eat (and not regret it at the end of the day). I also eat a lot of chicken since its one of the few “safe” foods that I know works for me, so I can certainly relate and sympathize with what you’re going through.

    I unfortunately don’t have much useful advise on the handling obnoxious people online (or offline) portion directly, however I will say in regards to this situation - most people who try to take a “hollier than thou” stance are just as bad at some other thing. I’ve yet to find someone who goes “Oh, you do X? You’re a bad person for doing so!” while also not being just as bad in regards to something like how they do their part in taking care of the environment (as an example). No one is perfect.

    I guarantee you if they were in our shoes they’d do the exact same thing, and there is not a single soul on this planet that could convince me otherwise. These conditions are brutal, and all we can do is try our best to endure and do what we can to minimize the effects from it. So do what works best for you, and don’t let anyone make you feel bad about it.