• nerdydaddy@lemmynsfw.com
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    69
    ·
    10 months ago

    I suggest not referring to women as “females”. Many find that to be de-humanizing.

    The question itself is fine.

    • schmidtster@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      72
      ·
      10 months ago

      My god, is every word going to get canceled eventually?

      When did using the term male and female become problematic?

      • Ahornygirl@lemmynsfw.com
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        64
        ·
        10 months ago

        It became problematic when misogynists began using the term female as a way to dehumanize women. These men feel the need to blame all of their problems on women while simultaneously believing that a woman will also solve all their problems. It’s an easy outlet to channel their rage while accepting zero responsibility for their own actions.

        • schmidtster@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          36
          ·
          edit-2
          10 months ago

          News flash, every word is going to be used for that. You have use context and intent in every interaction, don’t try to change other people just to make your life easier from a couple bad eggs. Yeesh.

          • Ahornygirl@lemmynsfw.com
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            46
            ·
            10 months ago

            don’t try to change other people just to make your life easier.

            Isn’t that what you’re trying to do right now?

            • schmidtster@lemmy.world
              link
              fedilink
              English
              arrow-up
              21
              ·
              edit-2
              10 months ago

              Pointing something out isn’t trying to change other people, but okay.

              But it’s good to know there is a new red flag to look out for in interactions with women. Is that word okay? Misogynists use that too, which term is acceptable in this exchange? Nah I’m leaving this lol.

              This is gonna have the Streisand effect, trying to pick the term you want is only going to fuel the wrong ones. It’s why it hasn’t taken off and why very few people know or even care. It’s hilarious that it’s a thing.

                • schmidtster@lemmy.world
                  link
                  fedilink
                  English
                  arrow-up
                  16
                  ·
                  edit-2
                  10 months ago

                  An op-ed on an extremely biased site means nothing to the general public. And is a far cry from being an “article” that should be taken seriously.

                  People use those sources in closed groups to validate each others biased opinions.

                  It’s a few people making a mountain out of a peanut.

                  I stand by my yeesh.

                  When I googled it, I found nothing but similar op-Ed’s. This isn’t a thing.

              • Ahornygirl@lemmynsfw.com
                link
                fedilink
                English
                arrow-up
                15
                ·
                edit-2
                10 months ago

                It’s funny to me because I didn’t make the initial comment. I did reply, to offer an opinion, as did another… however you chose only reply to the one person with “girl” in their name.

                Editing to add that I see you did make another comment below, so I’ll leave my original comment even though I am now mistaken in my reply!

                • schmidtster@lemmy.world
                  link
                  fedilink
                  English
                  arrow-up
                  11
                  ·
                  edit-2
                  10 months ago

                  What’s even funnier is, I replied to the parent comment and you responded to that one… and are now accusing me of only responded to a girl name, when that’s not even remotely the case.

                  Fuckin red flags every holy shit lmfao. Keep telling people to not use “females” so we can avoid interaction with people like you.

      • buzziebee@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        22
        ·
        10 months ago

        At least 10 or 15 years ago was when I first got informed about it. It’s likely been problematic for much longer. Its really not that hard to use the word “women” instead. Usually when people refer to men they use the word “men”, so it’s only fair to use women also. Females feels a bit icky tbf. Like women are a different species or something.

        • schmidtster@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          17
          ·
          edit-2
          10 months ago

          The term women is used in derogatory ways by misogynists too. No word is safe. Yeesh.

          Trying to change this is only going to make it worse, Streisand effect kind of thing.

          • some_guy@lemmy.dbzer0.com
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            19
            ·
            10 months ago

            Dude you have a dozen people saying “use a different word” and you just keep fighting back that you want to keep using it and they’re wrong.

            Go ahead buddy, keep using “females.” I can guarantee they won’t be using you.

          • otp@sh.itjust.works
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            15
            ·
            10 months ago

            The problem is when people use “female” and “men”.

            Male and female are sort of dehumanizing words. Great to use in science, but awkward to use in casual conversation. It’s like telling someone “Your epidermis looks so smooth”.

            When you use “females” in combination with more appropriate word for males (e.g., “men”), you end up sounding like an incel or something.

            And since people generally don’t use “males” when talking about men casually, even just using “females” outside an academic context is enough to make it sound a lot like how an incel would speak.

            So “females” isn’t a bad word, but incels use it in a way that demeans women. If you use it in a non-scientific context, you’ll probably end up sounding like an incel.

            (All the "you"s are meant to be the “general you”; I’m not trying to pick on anyone in particular)

            • schmidtster@lemmy.world
              link
              fedilink
              English
              arrow-up
              6
              ·
              edit-2
              10 months ago

              I have a female friend group and male friend group.

              Men and women sounds weird there, boy and girl can be taken wrong.

              Lots of people use the terms in every day use, I don’t know why it’s being claimed it’s not. People slip up, make mistakes.

              This just seems like an entire reverse white night scenario. People getting mad over nothing or just wanting to be angry about something.

              • knightly the Sneptaur@pawb.social
                link
                fedilink
                English
                arrow-up
                10
                ·
                10 months ago

                I have a female friend group and male friend group.

                The gendered terms there are adjectives which describe the two friend groups. Sounds fine.

                But using “female” by itself to refer to a woman should be avoided unless the speaker actually wants to sound like a Ferengi.

                No moral conflict or language policing necessary, just an awareness of the tonal implications of one’s word choices.

                • schmidtster@lemmy.world
                  link
                  fedilink
                  English
                  arrow-up
                  3
                  ·
                  10 months ago

                  Right people are human and make mistakes, so to accidentally use the term interchangeable is perfectly acceptable.

                  People are trying to make an issue out of nothing, the only op-Ed’s on this is a decade old at this point.

                  It’s not a thing, and never will be. Use context to help you instead of just deciding a word is suddenly derogatory.

          • buzziebee@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            12
            ·
            10 months ago

            I was just giving you some context. It isn’t some new complaint that’s just popped up. It’s also not a huge deal. You do you if you want to keep using the word “females” instead of women.

            Re: the Streisand effect. Anyone getting excited that they’ve found a new “trigger” and choosing to use it despite someone else calmly suggesting that a different word is better isn’t really worth any consideration.

    • Ahornygirl@lemmynsfw.com
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      16
      ·
      10 months ago

      It’s always a bit sus, but I try to give the benefit of the doubt at first. I haven’t creeped their post history yet to see if they’re misogynist yet.

      • nerdydaddy@lemmynsfw.com
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        16
        ·
        10 months ago

        This post was the first to be made. I think the other was made to get a rise out of “snowflakes” or whatever.

        The thing is that this post isn’t even shitty. The question is both fine and valid, and the OP hasn’t done anything terrible either. I just like pointing out things to improve communication.

        • Tippon@lemmy.dbzer0.com
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          2
          ·
          10 months ago

          Ah, they’re showing as being posted at the same time for me, 2 hours ago, but as OP posted the first reply there, I thought this one was a response.

          I only meant that they weren’t being shitty in the way that they used females. I thought that they were using it to bounce off the other post. I think that both questions are a bit weird, but valid.

          I’m not always good at communicating online. I tend to forget that other people are not thinking the same thing as me :)

          • nerdydaddy@lemmynsfw.com
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            4
            ·
            10 months ago

            That’s perfectly fine. I didn’t assume OP was shitty. I was pointing out the “females” thing because he would get a better response by using words that made women feel more comfortable.

  • Ahornygirl@lemmynsfw.com
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    31
    ·
    10 months ago

    Yes of course, everyone has different preferences, however thicker feels better than longer (for me). Bottoming out isn’t a fun experience at all 😐 a thicker penis gives better orgasms 🤷‍♀️

    • pickleproject@lemmynsfw.com
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      18
      ·
      10 months ago

      My SO likes a thicker penis and that has influenced my opinion in what I like about a penis. As a guy, seeing a woman stretch is more appealing than half a penis in a vagina, unable to get deeper.

        • pickleproject@lemmynsfw.com
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          2
          ·
          10 months ago

          It’s probably hard for you to generalize for all women. But those who prefer girth, is there a typical practical limit where it becomes too much?

          • knightly the Sneptaur@pawb.social
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            3
            ·
            10 months ago

            Of course, but most guys are within a standard deviation of average so it’s rarely an issue. The most common exception being for ladies with a narrow vaginal canal.

          • Ahornygirl@lemmynsfw.com
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            1
            ·
            10 months ago

            It requires more foreplay and (for some) I’m sure lots of lube (fortunately for me that hasn’t been a problem yet) but with a bit of time I’ve never had any issues. The largest girth I’ve experienced was about 6.5" FWIW.

              • Ahornygirl@lemmynsfw.com
                link
                fedilink
                English
                arrow-up
                1
                ·
                10 months ago

                It was a penis and it was great! He spent a lot of time on foreplay which really helped, and while it took a little while to take it all, it resulted in some fantastic orgasms.

                • Terpff1989@lemmynsfw.com
                  link
                  fedilink
                  English
                  arrow-up
                  2
                  ·
                  10 months ago

                  I love when a woman is tight enough to make it a bit of a challenge but it still fits in the end. Usually means I’m going to get milked dry

  • RBWellsV23@lemmynsfw.com
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    9
    ·
    10 months ago

    Wow most of this thread is about the way it’s asked but yes, up to a point more girth is very , very good. Obviously there’s a limit, most don’t enjoy fisting and I’m pretty sure nobody likes having a baby, it’s not a bigger is better situation.

    I will say that the best lover I had was hung thinner and longer which is the opposite of my preference so it’s not a requirement, nothing like that, but thicker than average and not too long feels best to me, everything else held constant.

  • pinkpint@lemmynsfw.com
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    8
    ·
    10 months ago

    Absolutely, thicker penises make me feel more full and makes it easier to cum. Length is not as important.

  • meliaesc@lemmynsfw.com
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    7
    ·
    10 months ago

    Absolutely, 100%. It of course depends on how aroused/wet I am, but there is a very tangible difference in every size.