Problem: Lasers have limited range before dispersal becomes an issue.

Solution: Move laser closer to target.

To quote Shadowrun, “Great, now I can flatten light ammo against hard armor faster than ever before.”

$20.1 million across three lawsuits. Bro had the wrong visa. He said he was here as a tourist, but clearly he was here on business.

[citation needed]

F-15: “I’ll kill any enemy as soon as it locks on.”

Kuwaiti F/A-18 pilot: fires without locking on

Now I want to see the Marine version with the hood that flips up when she takes off and lands.

Trump wants Americans to die so he can justify nationalizing or cancelling the midterms.

Morge (v): To add AI-generated slop to a previously unsoiled codebase.

Contrails contribute to global warming and are completely avoidable.

Hey, now, if Russia manages to build a replacement for the floating drydock that sank, they might be able to move their one aircraft carrier into strike range, and then we’ll really be in trouble…

When it sinks into the Baltic Sea.

…the proliferation of AI interviews comes as companies are complaining about a “deluge” of resumes.

Oh no, the companies that collectively laid off hundreds of thousands of workers are absolutely swamped with people looking for work!

These are people who ask what Obama was doing to prevent 9/11. Never mind that it happened three years before he was even elected to the Senate. They’ll blame everyone but themselves.

Kakistocracy.

TikTok, tomorrow: “We found the issue that was causing some users to be blocked from sending the word ‘Epstein’. Now all users are correctly blocked from sending the word ‘Epstein’.”