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jeffw@lemmy.worldM to News@lemmy.world · 2 years ago

Brazilian Sharks Test Positive for Cocaine

gizmodo.com

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  • cross-posted to:
  • nottheonion@lemmy.world
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Brazilian Sharks Test Positive for Cocaine

gizmodo.com

jeffw@lemmy.worldM to News@lemmy.world · 2 years ago
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  • cross-posted to:
  • nottheonion@lemmy.world
  • weirdnews@real.lemmy.fan
Trace amounts of cocaine have been detected in Brazilian sharks, raising concerns about the impact on marine life.
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  • xmunk@sh.itjust.works
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    2 years ago

    I’m Dr. Sharkzo and I like cocaaaaine.

    (I understand this reference might be a bit old for most of the platform but if you’re unfamiliar with it just browse some clips of Dr. Rockso)

    • iltoroargento@lemmy.sdf.org
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      2 years ago

      Ca-Ca-Ca YEEAAAHHH, baby…

    • fistac0rpse@fedia.io
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      2 years ago

      Metalocalypse isn’t old, it only came out… 18 years ago… damnit

      • xmunk@sh.itjust.works
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        2 years ago

        There is a person somewhere who just finished their SATs and was conceived to… DUNCAN HILLS COFFEE

    • blackluster117@possumpat.io
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      2 years ago

      So much cocaine…

    • thefartographer@lemm.ee
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      2 years ago

      A coo-coo-coo-coo!!!

  • zero_spelled_with_an_ecks@programming.dev
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    2 years ago

    Cocaine shark do do do do do do

    • cheese_greater@lemmy.world
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      2 years ago

      That song has to be a by-product of cocaine use

    • Kowowow@lemmy.ca
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      2 years ago

      “jar jar binks has a caribbean black accent”

  • Phenomephrene@thebrainbin.org
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    2 years ago

    I assume Cocaine Shark is already a movie on Tubi, but if it isn’t give it a couple weeks.

    • Canadian_anarchist@lemmy.ca
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      2 years ago

      It’s a movie produced in 2023: https://m.imdb.com/title/tt27036391/

      Shockingly, it’s not made by The Asylum.

      • charade_you_are@sh.itjust.works
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        2 years ago

        I’m kind of impressed. I’ve never seen a 1.8 imdb rating before

      • Phenomephrene@thebrainbin.org
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        Nice. And yeah, it’s on Tubi. I think it can be properly reclassified as a documentary given this article here.

      • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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        2 years ago

        And if you think that one’s scary, wait until you see Cocaine Pangolin.

    • FuglyDuck@lemmy.world
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      2 years ago

      Is that the sequel to Cocaine Bear? Where the sharks start swimming up rivers and they release the bear to fight the shark.

      Like a Godzilla movie?

      • Phenomephrene@thebrainbin.org
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        2 years ago

        First off, I get pretty serious about Godzilla movies, so we’ll leave that alone out of common decency.

        Second, the movie you’re describing is a franchise crossover between Cocaine Bear and Cocaine Shark. I heard they’re bringing Meth Moose in for the follow up.

        • FuglyDuck@lemmy.world
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          2 years ago

          Only in the genre, not in the same league.

          Also…. Meth Moose?? That’s actually a movie I’d watch.

          • Phenomephrene@thebrainbin.org
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            2 years ago

            It looks like there are a few meth gator movies out there, but nobody’s done a moose yet. If I were any kind of ambitious I might get that copyrighted. Fair game if anyone wants to use it though; I’d watch it too.

            • FuglyDuck@lemmy.world
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              2 years ago

              There’s probably some Hollywood script writer taking notes about to run off to the nearest LLM to slap prompts into.

        • cm0002@lemmy.world
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          2 years ago

          Then they’re gonna do a cross over event where they introduce Ganja Goose

      • Deello@lemm.ee
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        2 years ago

        Let them fight

  • SPRUNT@lemmy.world
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    2 years ago

    Does that mean they’re banned from the Olympics?

    • jeffw@lemmy.worldOPM
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      2 years ago

      No, they just can’t compete under the shark flag

  • enkille@lemmy.world
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    2 years ago

    How can a shark even do cocaine without a blowhole?

    • trxxruraxvr@lemmy.world
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      2 years ago

      Through the gills

    • cheese_greater@lemmy.world
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      2 years ago

      There are the real questions.

      Mabes they like feeling on their gums

  • Brave Little Hitachi Wand@lemmy.world
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    2 years ago

    I didn’t even know there were that many sharks

  • JPSound@lemmy.world
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    2 years ago

    …And my guy can’t find shit.

  • TransplantedSconie@lemm.ee
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    9 months ago

    deleted by creator

  • CaptKoala@lemmy.ml
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    2 years ago

    Brazilian snowpowder, works on people, works on sharks. Wonder what else it’ll work on.

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