What if you told this girl you want to try to be friends, but please make an effort to not be so hot when you’re hanging out together. No makeup, her least flattering clothes
So basically “don’t be yourself and walk on eggshells around me at all times”. That’d make me just not want to be around you, even as a friend. Friends don’t do that. Do not ask her that.
Adding: that request would make me feel not just uncomfortable but actually unsafe.
Okay maybe it’s just because I’m an old woman and the world has changed, but in my day I had a lot of guy friends around whom I didn’t try to be cute or sexy and we stayed just friends. Gonna agree that probably it’s something she has to decide on her own, not be asked. If I knew the guy had a crush and was trying to get over it I would be my unvarnished self. Maybe also my perspective is different from yours because I don’t choose to wear makeup for myself, only to look like I made an effort in social occasions.
The part about walking on eggshells is your addition, I didn’t say or imply that.
So basically “don’t be yourself and walk on eggshells around me at all times”. That’d make me just not want to be around you, even as a friend. Friends don’t do that. Do not ask her that.
Adding: that request would make me feel not just uncomfortable but actually unsafe.
Okay maybe it’s just because I’m an old woman and the world has changed, but in my day I had a lot of guy friends around whom I didn’t try to be cute or sexy and we stayed just friends. Gonna agree that probably it’s something she has to decide on her own, not be asked. If I knew the guy had a crush and was trying to get over it I would be my unvarnished self. Maybe also my perspective is different from yours because I don’t choose to wear makeup for myself, only to look like I made an effort in social occasions.
The part about walking on eggshells is your addition, I didn’t say or imply that.