I, the camel, want everyone to understand that there are no har feelings if you dont answer. Mostly its work shit or too long to text. Please forgive me. Amen.

There are things which don’t fucking belong in text. “Hey I can’t get your TV to turn on and play anything” well, there are four devices and three remotes man, what exactly are you trying to accomplish - play PS, play OTA DVR or play media? Yeah let me sit down and write a fucking dissertation through a mobile device’s UI about this, sure. Or I could just call?

If you’re in my very short contact list, I’ll happily answer and talk to you, if you want to. Otherwise, text, or even email is the best way to contact me.

I treat my doorbell similarly–text or call before coming over, or even from right in front of the door, I don’t answer the door if I don’t know who it is. Also, I don’t have an ICE surveillance camera on my doorbell, so no, I can’t see who is there, nor do I care. Call or text, or fuck off.

EDIT: With the one exception of Girl Scouts selling cookies, but they don’t seem to do that door-to-door here anymore, sadly.

I’m with the kid I fucking hate horses