I left Reddit to get away from that, but unfortunately there still seem to be a fair number of users here that also are convinced men are the real underclass, victimized by everything.
I think I mostly run into it on meme communities. Is that just the destiny of all meme communities? To be overtaken by MRAs? It sucks because I genuinely like memes, but I don’t like randomly being smacked in the face by misogyny all the time. Any other communities I should avoid?
Any insight or tips appreciated 🥰
I think that most men have a blind spot for this kind of sexism and while you may feel the same as I do about these topics, I don’t think you’re immune from said blind spot.
If the vast majority was better about calling out the “loud, small minority”, then maybe the minority wouldn’t feel so big. Silence is complicity.
But thats what I’m saying. I see the vast majority consistently calling out, downvoting and arguing against that minority. Significantly moreso than any other mixed online space I’ve engaged with. That’s the difference I see and I think is being completely ignored. The overall cultural stance here is strongly against. Whereas every other major platform even remotely like this isn’t. I guess pushing for better isn’t a bad thing but I see it as a disingenuous angle. If anyone can make an account and engage, shitheads will poke out, its the way they are reacted to that sets the cultural standard. I see the way they’re reacted to being highly negative. I see it as, there are some sexist people on Lemmy and they are consistently treated as shitty by the majority. Not, Lemmy is a sexist place for sexist people.
I see a lot of those comments heavily upvoted and supported, especially when an OP is a woman. Take a look at any of violet’s posts and comments to see a clear example. You should really look through that post I linked to you - it’s the women of Lemmy talking about this issue.
You should have seen the type of comments and DMs I got when the Graham Platner rapist story was revealed.
There are some communities where it’s better moderated than others. I find Lemmy to be significantly worse with the misogyny than Reddit for example. When men are the overwhelming demographic in a place, sexism and misogyny are allowed to flourish. Lemmy is reminiscent of early Reddit and 4chan these days.
Your comments are coming really close to claiming “Not All Men!” as a way to wash your hands of this.
That is fair,I do typically avoid Violets posts because of her age. Even at only 32 it makes me a bit uncomfortable. But I’d feel the same if it was a self proclaimed 18 year old male posting about how much they love drinking piss. It’s good she can express herself and all, just not my thing to engage with personally. I read through many of the comments and I can’t disagree sexsim exists here. I still strongly believe its the small minority and consistently frown upon by the majority. Aside from all that, I just so heavily disagree with that entire last statement lol. Considering lemmy to be even remotely close to old or contemporary 4chan/Reddit is completely insane. It kind of makes me feel you’ve not engaged with old or contemporary 4chan especially but reddit too. You know both sites have in the past and currently still host literal footage of rape,murder, sexual assault. Especially 4chan, there are at all times a “women rekt” (videos of dead women, them being raped, killed and/or assaulted) threads floating around. Reddit has dedicated misogynistic non kink communities with thousands of participants. The part I think is most important about that also, it has NOTHING to do with an actual ideologic stance. Its about advertising and making money. Thats why subreddits like jailbait, incel , etcetera. Only started disappearing when big money started coming in. Communities and posts like that do not and have not (to my knowledge) exist here. Clearly that’s based ideologically not financially. I just really see that last paragraph as so completely ignorant and disingenuous.
That’s exactly why I can compare Lemmy to early Reddit. Lemmy hasn’t embraced advertising and making money, so these views are still tolerated and allowed to exist here in a way that is moderated differently on Reddit now.
There’s pros and cons to Reddit going public.
Those views are quarantined to those subreddits while the sexism spills out on Lemmy everywhere.
So why don’t communities like jailbait, beatingwomen, incel, watchwomendie etcetera exist here then?
There’s not as many users on Lemmy and since those spaces already exist and are populated, people are going to use those spaces first before creating them here. In addition, times were different back in the early aughts when Reddit came to be.
Comparing them doesn’t mean they’re the exact same beat for beat.
The sexism in Lemmy is pervasive and I see it every day. Most of it is casual sexism like positing that women are geriatric in their 30s or women are gold-diggers or women choose to harm themselves with plastic surgery. Whether you believe the multitudes of women saying this same thing about Lemmy is up to you.
Early aughts, you mean like 2 years ago in Reddits case and literally today in 4chan’s? So its not that Lemmy wouldn’t tolerate them, it’s that nobody has tried and if they did, it would go well… We are gonna go in circles. I disagree with you but realistically I’m not the one affected so that doesn’t really matter. It sucks you have to deal with any hate. As with our prior pedophile/rape apologist conversation, I’m going to continue to call out shitty behavior and I know you will too. I appreciate the discussion Velma.