• Sprucie@feddit.uk
      1242·
      11 months ago

      If it was a bar of soap moulded into a cock though we’d probably be seeing a pretty similar post

        • MJKee9@lemmy.world
          1146·
          11 months ago

          Rubbing soap on any part of your body in a way that simulates sex is not “safe”… Especially if that area is your junk.

          Edit: when you make a comment of which you can speak on with authority and then a bunch downvotes come because it offended someone’s hypothetical ideal. You guys are worse than /r/the_donald.

          • ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world
            318·
            11 months ago

            I don’t see how masturbating with soap has any increased risk of soap in the urethra than normal washing. Especially when you wash yourself everyday. It would also matter on how often you do it. If you’re jerking it with soap every time you jerk it yeah you increase the likelihood but if it’s a once in a while thing it would be a negligible increase in odds.

            I can’t believe I just put that much thought into jerking it with soap.

            • Pelicanen@sopuli.xyz
              63·
              11 months ago

              Men have a similar, although not as sensitive, environment under their foreskin as women do, so it’s not just the urethra that is the issue. That being said, the consequences of that are usually limited to itchiness and a smell, and not a full-blown infection.

              • blady_blah@lemmy.world
                121·
                11 months ago

                Yeah, I call bullshit on this. Not washing under your foreskin is how you get an infection, not washing there too much.

                • Pelicanen@sopuli.xyz
                  51·
                  11 months ago

                  You should wash under there with lukewarm water or, if you absolutely feel the need to, gentle soap that is specifically made for cleaning your privates. Doing it with regular soap can cause issues.

                  Source: Have foreskin, washed with soap, talked with doctor.

    • Fuckfuckmyfuckingass@lemmy.world
      513·
      11 months ago

      Idk man, fucking a bar of soap, clearly on the reg , and leaving it for the world to see is a bit different. Plus I feel like most dildo users have the presence of mind to put that shit up when they’re done.

      • ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world
        14·
        11 months ago

        My ex would disagree as she’d leave hers lying out even when we had company over.

        We were both also very mental unwell so that could be a part of it

      • shalafi@lemmy.worldEnglish
        132·
        11 months ago

        That was made that way for the joke. How would you even begin fucking a flat bar of soap? Even pre-drilled, it would wear out too fast to be any fun.

        Don’t use conditioner guys!!!

        For the 4th time (I’m an idiot) I got serious dick issues. Don’t know if it dries the skin out or what, but the end gets hypersensitive, turns dark red, skin turns black and peels off, hurts like hell, and then you get nice, new pink skin. It’s painful and revolting and takes about a week for the whole process.

        Thought was just me until I saw a reddit post a few months back. LOTS of dudes experiencing the same exact thing.

        Don’t use conditioner guys!!!

        • Bob@feddit.nl
          122·
          11 months ago

          Would you mind choosing a verb other than “use” so I know what in God’s name I shouldn’t be doing with conditioner?

          • shalafi@lemmy.worldEnglish
            131·
            11 months ago

            If the context didn’t provide, I meant jacking off. Paddling the pink canoe. Abusing the wicked stick. Battling the purple-headed yogurt slinger. Shaking hands with the milkman. Boxing the one-eyed champ. Taking the self-guided tour.

        • dingus@lemmy.worldEnglish
          4·
          11 months ago

          Even if you accidentally use conditioner instead of lube, there’s no way it will make the skin of your dick turn black and fall off. It’ll irritate your skin sure, but that won’t happen.

          One of two things must actually actually be happening…

          1. You’re using the conditioner lube to fuck something like sandpaper or a sex toy that is literally set on fire

          2. You’ve confused conditioner with something like lye or hydrochloric acid

          For the love of Christ, get your shit checked out

          • shalafi@lemmy.worldEnglish
            27·
            11 months ago

            Want a pic? It’s at the blackened and peeling stage. Shower water hit it tonight and I yelped. Brand new skin in just a few more days!

        • MrGG@lemmy.ca
          31·
          11 months ago

          This is the kind of wholesome informative content I come to Lemmy for. Thank you for your service, sir!

          Actually, wait, I have a question. How did your ball-hair feel aftwards? Did it help with testicular split ends?

          • shalafi@lemmy.worldEnglish
            410·
            11 months ago

            Ball hair is mostly nonexistent. But here come more conditioner tips!

            Decided to get nice and clean for my ex-wife. Showered and used a little conditioner on the meat puppet. She stuck it in her mouth and made a face. “Tastes like shampoo!”

            That woman could pop the balloon on the sexiest of times. Ever had a lover so tacky as to complain, in the moment?! Not like, “Move a little.”, or “Ouch, not like that.” More like… Know what? Not gonna relive that foul woman.

      • garbagebagel@lemmy.world
        3·
        11 months ago

        When my sister and I lived with my parents our shower broke for a bit so we had to use my parents’ shower for a few days. Guess who forgot to take their dildo out of there… It was my sister not me but lucky for her and unlucky for me, my parents never clarified so they’ll just think what they will.

    • captainlezbian@lemmy.world
      305·
      11 months ago

      If this were a woman posting a dildo she’d get flamed. Use sex toys all you want, but don’t fuck soap, it’s ironically unsanitary

      • ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world
        135·
        11 months ago

        I’ve covered that aspect already in other comment chains.

        Also this picture is clearly a joke. You wouldn’t be able to actually use that to masturbate as the hole would grow rapidly. You’d have to lather your hands first using either bar or liquid soap.

        Yeah jamming your dick into a solid bar of soap is gonna cause a lot of issues. The one I’d imagine being the first to worry about is your dick getting bruised cause bar soap ain’t exactly soft

  • Cyrus Draegur@lemm.eeEnglish
    1295·
    11 months ago

    Stupid. This dude has the cleanest dick in the country.

    “Eew this penis is too clean to go inside my body” that’s what this whiny bitch sounds like.

    No, they totally SHOULD leave. They are clearly too filthy for this CLEAN KING.

  • MrGG@lemmy.ca
    641·
    11 months ago

    He’d end up disappointed that her pussy doesn’t bubble during sex, anyway.