This one lady is considered very kind. She is to most people, that’s why they consider her this way. The lady’s friend says they’re the problem if the lady is mean to them.
I’ve been treated very badly for having learning disabilities and attention problems. Rather than talk to me and try to help me, this lady tried to beat me up, wants to hurt me, and is now ignoring me because she said she hates me and blocked me. I’m happy without her, though.
Is it possible that she can act like this and still be a good and kind person despite hating people with problems and being a bit homophobic?
It costs nothing to be kind to someone. She isn’t s good person.
No. She is not a good person.
No.
In the words of Shirley Bennett: “kind people are kind”
If someone is unkind to anyone. They are unkind. It’s easy.
Sorry you’re getting mistreated. You deserve to be loved how you are.
This 100% OP. And even if they have issues with you you don’t ever deserve physical violence on you.
She cares more about how she is perceived than how she actually affects others. She decided you are someone that others won’t care if she abuses or bullies so she takes her frsutrations out on you. This is vibes based psychoanalysis but I feel I am not far off atleast.
You probably aren’t far off. Since I have a disability and people are pissed off when I ACT DISABLED, she treats me like actual shit.
No, this is terrible. She’s immature for not talking to you about it LOL. She should just say “Please don’t do that/Please pay attention”. You won’t know what she doesn’t like about you if she doesn’t tell you.
Is it possible that she can act like this and still be a good and kind person despite hating people with problems and being a bit homophobic?
Her kindness is conditional. For people who match those conditions that “activate” kindness, they can’t understand the problem because they don’t see the other side of her, thus it must be “your fault” somehow.
I’ll bet that she never shows her bad side when her supporters are around. If she actually does , and they are fine with it, then I advise you to distance yourself from all of these people.
I knew someone like this, the level of gas lighting was awful. It really messed with my head for years.
I’m sorry that happened :( I hate people like that
She called me a dog and asked me why I cared about her so much
People don’t always make sense in their actions, and you might be trying to spend more effort understanding her than she is worth. Many people only have shallow “relationships” or interactions with each other, so it’s possible that people you know have not gotten to know her beyond social pleasantries.
Have you heard about Mother Theresa? How she was such a good and holy person because she dedicated herself to the poor and sick? That when she died, the was a huge movement around the world to have her become a saint? Well, the world knows now that she was cruel to all those people. And she was using her position to continue abusing people that she felt were lesser than her.
It’s pretty clear from this post, and your other posts, that this lady is not safe for you to be around. Saying that you don’t want to be around someone should be enough, and you do not have to explain to anyone why you do not like her. I hope you have people in your life that can help keep you safe
Why did this lady try to beat you up?
Because OP is disabled, from what I see
If this lady was walking her dog, spotted OP down the street, said “I think they have a disability” and then jogged down the street to sucker punch them, then I actually doubt OPs assertion that people generally think this lady is a good person.
OP has correctly concluded that things aren’t adding up here. I’m taking OP at their word that they want to understand. It might be that their assessment that others see this lady as good isn’t correct. It might also be that their assessment that the reason for the “trying to beat up” wasn’t because of their disability.
I’ve known some high-functioning autistic people who’ve gotten physically struck from saying extremely inappropriate things (from the perspective of the listener) after missing 100 social cues that people are incredibly offended. It’s unjustifiable, but I’d have been a shitty friend if I didn’t help them understand the social cues and why extremely accurate assessments should not always be vocalized… Or at least to understand how people are likely to react so they can make informed decisions.
No idea if this is OPs sitch, but it sounds like they’re trying to navigate a scenario they don’t understand, and I know I have more to offer than affirmations if they want that.
They did it when I went to their house
We’re going to need much more detail to accurately assess her behavior. At the risk of blaming the victim, but we can’t even establish that you’re the victim yet. There’s some situations where a punch would be totally justified and you haven’t confirmed or denied anything.
First things first, were you invited to her house (or had reason to think she’d welcome you)?
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I was invited. I went to her house and she invited me to go to her room. She pushed me onto the bed and told me to take my clothes off (she wanted to see if I was fat or something) but I refused. She said she was going to beat me up for refusing, but then she stopped and asked why I cared about her.
She left to do something, and I left the house and went home.
She just told me “fuck you, you should get tortured”
That’s a terrible thing to say to anyone, for any reason. I’m sorry that happened to you.
Did they say that as soon as you arrived? Or had you been talking before that?
Also, what is your relationship to this person?
Friends with one of my friends
No this person is terrible and you should cut off contact if you can. Confide in a trusted friend/family member.
