• MehBlah@lemmy.worldEnglish
    3·
    1 hour ago

    Happily single is how I describe it. Still got my kids and they are grown. No one has to put up with me and I don’t have to take shit from anyone in my personal life.

    • ArtemisimetrA@lemm.ee
      1·
      3 hours ago

      Or, to bring Relational Anarchism to bear, a relationship is an ongoing interaction between people, sometimes even just with one’s own self. Then, having established that a relationship exists, the participants of this relationship may choose to define said relationship using whatever terms and conditions they feel are fitting. And here’s the clincher: nobody outside of the relationship gets to have any say in what ANY aspect of that relationship means. Friendship? That’s literally got “ship” in it, but parenthood? Also a relationship. Professional, personal, inter-personal, monogamous, non-monogamous, poly, aromantic, FWB… All valid terms to use, and not a single one of them can possibly define a relationship by itself.

    • Demdaru@lemmy.world
      15·
      9 hours ago

      I dunno how I feel about this summing up. Like, yeah, but also so much more. For one they mostly remove gut wrenching feeling xD

    • CitizenKong@lemmy.world
      9·
      8 hours ago

      Yep, a good relationship should just be your favourite person to spend time with that you also find sexually attractive (and vice versa).

      • oppy1984@lemm.eeEnglish
        4·
        4 hours ago

        Honestly I get it, I’ve been single for 11 years now. I went through a series of toxic relationships and the last one broke me. After her I decided to take a break from dating a try to figure out why I kept attracting only toxic women.

        It’s been 11 years and I still haven’t figured it out, and now I’m in my 40’s and don’t really want to date again. What I’m trying to say is, take some time, heal, get your head straight, but get back out there sooner than later. It’s easy to fall into the “I’m happier single” mindset, but difficult to get out of.

      • surewhynotlem@lemmy.world
        4·
        7 hours ago

        at least thus far

        You can do it!

        Or don’t. Whatever life you want to live is fine. I’m not here to kink shame.

  • recklessengagement@lemmy.world
    7·
    8 hours ago

    Dated a string of people who didn’t deserve my trust, so I know that gut-wrenching feeling all too well. Life is more peaceful without it.

    • Sillyglow@lemmy.ca
      5·
      7 hours ago

      They always talk about wading through a bunch of weeds or whatever but hey, I get it, no one has that kind of time anymore to wade through a bunch of assholes to find the fhe one decent person anymore. Life gets short. It can become the kind of noise and drama you just don’t want to mar up your life with.

      Out of the plethora of coffee dates from the online apps I’d say there were approx 90% of the people on there that really shouldn’t be dating others and should be in some sort of counselling or just straight up scammers. Several hadn’t been in any relationship that lasted more than 6 months for a good reason.

      Even in the last 10% maybe there was no chemistry but I did make some friends. One I’m still good friends with even today since Covid times.

      It took about 3 yrs to find someone worth dating with chemistry. Like seriously it’s like friggin career training these days.

    • MBech@feddit.dk
      4·
      10 hours ago

      That was the only thing that pushed me out of bed for a while, the fact that I’d get to come home to the perfect woman later.

  • Rin@lemm.ee
    6·
    9 hours ago

    I’ve had a lot of painful relationships so i understand. It takes time, especially if you get burnt. It’s still good to find someone nice who will eventually become your one.