Trump? At my door? No idea what you’re talking about. He was never here. My security cameras are just for show, they didn’t see nothing. Good luck finding him.
No way he can drive stick
The mental image of Trump in a Miata with a 5 point harness trying to figure out stick in busy city traffic is almost good enough to let him borrow it.
Castle Doctrine
Y’all are crazy, the SS is gonna find you, there’s no being subtle.
He’s a frail almost 80 year old man. Just punk his ass in the doorway and accept the consequences. You’ll die based af and go to Valhalla.
Ask him to stay and enjoy my house for a minute, maybe fuck my wife if she’s game, while I snuck-out to cut my brake-lines. For the record, he didn’t ask nicely, he stole it, and wouldn’t listen when I told him its un-suitable for one of such august prestige.
Warmly welcome him, and insist that I drive him myself while he enjoys drinking whatever alcohol he wants. And off we merrily drive, to a shortcut that I know of, in the woods.
Aww you’re a romantic
Kick him in the balls as hard as I possibly could
Smile in his face I'll say, "Come let us go I've a cask of Amontillado" Sheltered inside from the cold of the snow Follow me now to the vault down below Drinking the wine as we laugh at the time Which is passing incredibly slow "What are these chains that are binding my arms?" Part of you dies each passing day Say, "It's a game" and I'll come to no harm You'll feel your life slipping away You who are rich and whose troubles are few May come around to see my point of view What price the crown of a King on his throne When you're chained in the dark all alone "Spare me my life only name your reward" Part of you dies each brick I lay "Bring back some light in the name of the Lord" You'll feel your mind slipping awayJust a song I was suddenly reminded of - no reason…
Sadly no castle doctrine here


