If you use a turkey baster then that counts as tool-assisted.

what a girl gonna do for you when she can’t even be arsed to regulate her own body temperature

“Dear Shigesato Itoi, pls add dual wield in next EB patch. I am not a crackpot.”

Congrats! Enjoy your poo.

Yes isn’t even at this concert.

translator’s note: translations not to scale. do not use these translations for translative purposes

Too late, they have all been added to my lexicon.

I’m learning basic Chinese and I found out that tofu (豆腐, “dòu fu”) means “corrupted bean.”

I just had someone I normally respect tell me “I’ve only seen white people take your position” when I said that I wouldn’t cast my vote for genocidal Democrats, were I an American. While they were also claiming that voting for Harris is critical to protecting the American trans community.

I can’t even fathom a response to this.

Jesus is Chinese now.

Leave Korean Jesus alone! He ain’t got time for you, he busy! With Korean shit!

I don’t mind people voting for liberal candidates if they’re otherwise struggling, lost, and/or confused and need to feel like they’re doing something, for lack of understanding of the nature of organizing collective action. If it’s a little peace of mind, okay, they deserve it.

What offends me about electoralism are the people who speak of the act of voting in moral terms.

Didn’t the Greens offer a coalition with the NDP last time in exchange for killing the Trans Mountain Pipeline, or something similar?

Anyone without a rich daddy is a sucker.

Chapo confirmed being gay with their dad.

It insists upon itself.

Dear Elon, I wrote you, but you still ain’t callin’

I left my cell, my pager and my home phone at the bottom

I sent two letters back in autumn, you must not’ve got 'em

There prob’ly was a problem at the post office or somethin’

Sometimes I scribble addresses too sloppy when I jot 'em

But anyways, fuck it, what’s been up, man? How’s your daughter?

My girlfriend’s pregnant too, I’m 'bout to be a father

If I have a daughter, guess what I’ma call her? I’ma name her Grimes

Keep your stick on the ice.

Doesn’t “tankie” just mean you’re jealous that someone hates fascism more than you do?

It’s some kind of heaven.

1 like and i’ll kill my dad

What we all picture every time someone tells us “Try not to get too political.”