I kind of saw this coming. It doesn’t matter, because I didn’t prepare. I kept hoping things werent as bad as i’ve thought. I’ve spent a lot of days since Jan 20 trying to thread a needle between staying appraised of what’s going on, for my own safety, and trying not to give in to panic and despair.
But… life has been hard. I disassociate from scary stuff. Most days I don’t think about things, while a little voice in my head screams, “You can’t be sitting still. There’s so much you need to do.”
But that’s what I do. I spend a lot of time trying to find work and make ends meet. I spend a lot of time just coping with my moment on a small level; the wider world seems unimportant when my day to day struggle is mostly… trying to be ok
but im starting to realize I can’t be ok. I have a lot of time that’s being wasted. Things are happening in the US that are about to make my life hellish and dangerous, and i’m doing nothing, trying to find a job and acting like things aren’t going to be absolutely batty within a year.
I can’t do it anymore, but I don’t have a natural mindset that lets me just break out.
What are y’all doing? How do you overcome the urge to just… keep going on the track you know?
I can’t keep acting like everything is fine. Nothing is fucking fine.
There is only so much you as an individual can do. We live in a society that is designed to make most of us completely dependent on an oligarchic class. Even in the imperial core the treats are drying up because the ruling class is scraping the sides of the peanut butter jar for profits. This is late stage capitalism.
Do what you can to ensure the safety of yourself and those you love.
Get involved in your community, build networks and rapport with people that can help solidify the environment around you. Get very local.
Beyond all that, survive. The people doing these things above all want to destroy anyone different.
Surviving and continuing to be yourself is one of the biggest "fuck you"s that you can hand to them.