our midwife gave us some very solid advice to talk about with the pediatrician and ended it with “make sure to tell him you got this fror chatgpt and not a midwife, it makes doctors take you more seriously” :agony:

honestly she is such a well of information and such a kind-hearted good person and an elite expert, the stuff this woman can recall of the top of her head is mind-boggling, but gets slandered by our pediatricians boss it’s fucking gut-wrenching. They keep saying that she is part of some circle of sheisters that recommend unnecessary procedures to make bank and we know the truth but there’s nothing we can do…

  • insurgentrat [she/her, it/its]@hexbear.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    4
    ·
    8 hours ago

    I had a spell with intense nerve damage pain. it’s still pretty rough but managed.

    Because doctors couldn’t work out what was happening they assumed I was lying. I literally said to multiple doctors “Please, I am in so much pain I am considering euthanising myself, I don’t want to die. Please help me”

    And got labelled a drug seeker.

    I ended up harvesting opium from the wild to cope and would you believe eventually they found nerve damage!

  • ☂️-@lemmy.ml
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    24
    ·
    17 hours ago

    doctors feel the same to me as car mechanics.

    i distrust them by default, and i hate that i have to because it complicates things that don’t really need to be complicated.

    • ToastedRavioli@midwest.social
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      4
      ·
      11 hours ago

      The modern American medical system is definitely rife with bullshit. I avoid getting most regular medical care anymore after having so many doctors put me on medication that did not solve anything and created additional problems for no reason. I still get vaccinations and would trust getting urgent/emergency care for specific issues. But other than that doctors seem to just want to treat patients as cash cows and nothing else

      My grandpa, who is in his mid 90s, quit taking all of his medication years ago. You would think a 90 year olds medication would be pretty critical, and that him not taking any of it would be concerning to the doctors. Every time he gets a checkup now they just tell him he is doing great. Basically the same thing that happened to me after quitting taking the multitude of prescriptions they had me loaded up with once upon a time, except I was practically a kid and not elderly

  • XiaCobolt [she/her]@hexbear.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    27
    ·
    18 hours ago

    I literally work in healthcare and I frequently tell my trans friends “it’s always okay to lie to a cis doctor”.

    Recently I’ve had to tell my cis girlfriends “it’s always okay to lie to a male doctor”

    • mathemachristian [he/him]@hexbear.netOP
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      7
      ·
      10 hours ago

      I kept having to remind my wife to not mention her PTSD, or at least don’t lead with it! She has trouble going against authority but I swear I have seen doctors expressions visibly go from attentive to relaxed the moment it is mentioned. I’ll leave out my fantasies about what I would like to do them, instead I just repeat exactly what she said but with a much more masculine voice and sometimes it helps. My face at the end of the visit was just a mr beast smile. Thank god we found proper healthcare professionals for her now…

    • JustSo [she/her, any]@hexbear.net
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      18
      ·
      17 hours ago

      I reckon you could do a post about this. It’s fucked up how many times I’ve seen trans people get denied basic medical care because the doctor can’t get past “the trans thing” and start speculating wildly that HRT might interact badly with fucking acetaminophen or something. It’s fucked up and you have to be pretty wily to know to hold your cards sometimes.

  • RondoRevolution [any, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    23
    ·
    18 hours ago

    So I can’t say this about other places, not even in the rest of Latin America, but here in Brasil doctors are actually a kind of a big issue that is not discussed nearly enough. Medical school is really hard to get into, so those that are able to pay for preparatory courses, often the rich and the upper-middle class, have a huge advantage over everyone else, but that’s only for the public universities, private medical school is also extremely prohibitive because it’s extremely expensive.

    This creates all sort of issues, not only are white people overrepresented (thinking about it now, I don’t remember ever seeing a black doctor in person in my life), but the people that gets to attend medical school tend to have been spoiled kids that feel superior than other people and think they can get away with anything. It goes all the way from smaller stuff like the staggering amount of students that have an ego the size of jupiter and demands you to call them doctors, all the way to stuff like this:

    CW: Sexual assault

    In 2023, a video went viral of a bunch of medicine students of Unisa pulling down their pants and faking masturbation during a woman’s volleyball match. After that, 15 students were expelled, then they were later reinstated.

    In 2025, 12 students were expelled and 11 more were punished by the Santa Marcelina university after they took a photo holding a banner withremoved apologia written on it.

    And these are just 2 cases of students, there’s a multitude more of just as bad stuff if not worse. There’s one case of a doctor that makes me wanna vomit, I’ll not say what it was, but here’s the link of a news coverage if you’re curious, just be warned IT’S REALLY, REALLY, REALLY BAD and there’s a very triggering image at the end of the page, one time I was watching the news late at night and a recording of him just appeared in the TV with no fucking warning. I have also seen all sorts of videos by women doctors or medicine students reporting all sorts of stuff, even reporting on the sort of disgusting stuff you can imagine people that work with corpses do.

    Suffice to say, I don’t trust male doctors and male morgue workers at all.

  • BarrelsBallot@lemmygrad.ml
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    11
    ·
    16 hours ago

    Drs are only good for the legal stuff like signatures, any of the real advice I’ve gotten have been from lab techs and other support staff.

  • Dimmer06 [he/him,comrade/them]@hexbear.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    48
    ·
    edit-2
    21 hours ago

    It’s crazy how bad doctors are allowed to be at their jobs. I know a lot of it is systemic to the US’ hyper-decentralized market driven triaged medical system but basically everyone I know has a story about a doctor who just totally ignored them, got a diagnosis wrong, or made a serious surgical mistake. Unless they cause you serious physical harm and you win a lawsuit against them there’s really no repurcussions for mistreatment.

    I understand people make mistakes but the fact that it’s so prevelant in medicine, one of the few jobs that really doesn’t have room for mistakes, is absurd.

    • My favourite part is if you file a complaint through the college of physicians, the first thing they do is hand it over to the doctor unredacted to get their side of it. So now the doctor knows you complained and can retaliate by putting whatever they want in you medical record, cause doctors believe other doctors but not us. If your record says, combative/difficult/hypocondriac whatever that will skew the perception of the next doctor.

    • ☂️-@lemmy.ml
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      5
      ·
      17 hours ago

      definitely not only in the us. doctors can be very much like this over here.

  • Awoo [she/her]@hexbear.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    43
    ·
    22 hours ago

    In my experience there is a significant difference between the behaviour and attitudes of american healthcare people and elsewhere in the world. When I needed to see doctors in america they were some really awful people compared to the doctors I have seen in europe. This wasn’t just doctors though, the nurses were not great people compared to european nurses either.

    It must be a system thing causing this.

    • mathemachristian [he/him]@hexbear.netOP
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      40
      ·
      22 hours ago

      This is germany. The arrogance of a doctor combined with the arrogance of a german. There are some genuinely awesome people, particularly in obstetrics I found, but otherwise it’s hit-or-hard-miss.

      • Awoo [she/her]@hexbear.net
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        20
        ·
        22 hours ago

        Ahh, well carry on then. I completely assumed because most are americans here. I’ve not had to experience German healthcare fortunately. My experience is French, Czech, UK/Scotland, US, Canada. The US was noticeably different to the others.

        • mathemachristian [he/him]@hexbear.netOP
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          22
          ·
          22 hours ago

          if you ever have the misfortune you gotta look for the woke healthcare workers. Once you’ve found one (regardless of specialty or even profession) they can typically recommend others, it’s like an underground network of woke healthcare-professional lol. That is if they have you clocked as one of their own, which should be trivial for most hexbears I think, it’s honetsly a really nice thing to see. The issue with pediatricians is you don’t really get a choice since they have to be close to where you live and are all overcrowded.

  • immuredanchorite [he/him, any]@hexbear.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    36
    ·
    21 hours ago

    this is a hot take and shouldn’t be applied to every pediatrician: many people in the US work in pediatrics because they are incredibly sheltered, judgmental, lack true compassion, and are the most self-righteous.

    many people in pediatrics choose working with children because children are innocent and their disease cannot be blamed on personal moral failings (and these types absolutely view a lot of illness as justice for personal moral failing.) They absolutely judge parents for their childrens illness too, however. these are the people that wont take good care of diabetics, smokers, and addicts because they don’t like them and can never imagine themselves or their loved ones being sick that way. They lack true compassion and so they pick a field where they can act as savior but only for the perfect victim. This also applies to a whole lot of oncologists (cancer is random so many “good” adults suffer from it too). Sorry if this sounds jaded, but it has always driven me crazy how judgmental people in US healthcare can be. Its an emotionally exhausting work environment but many choose to hate their patients instead of the system that causes so much illness and so much injustice

  • Lussy [he/him, des/pair]@hexbear.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    15
    ·
    19 hours ago

    Out of all the people I know who ended up studying medicine, I think perhaps one went into it for anything resembling the right reason

    I genuinely think the good, well meaning doctors are a very small minority

    • Dr_Pepper [he/him]@hexbear.net
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      26
      ·
      21 hours ago

      I have a good therapist now, but before that my best experience was someone who basically was the equivalent of talking to wall. All the others I had made my life worse. I had sworn off professional therapy for the most part before my current one salvaged that.