Had a weird ass episode for like 5 minutes where all the thoughts were just constantly screaming to start a company to obtain wealth and the desire permeated throughout every fibre of my being
Either this shit is bringing out and magnifying my inner 
or something about stimulants effect on the CNS is triggering the desire for money since they both target the same area of the brain apparently source
Easily one of the weirder things to have happened wtf
Ultimately we’re a product of our material conditions and our current material conditions are liberalism realised so don’t take this as a personal attack but I’m not surprised that a stimulant made you feel like you could conquer the world and our natural instinct is going to be to conquer the world via liberal means. In short, that basically means coming up with plans of starting a million dollar company.
If you were part of a revolutionary vanguard in the early 1900s in Europe then you probably would have drawn up plans to kick off the revolution instead.
I wouldn’t stress too much about being a so crypto a lib that not even you are aware of it until you’re on stimulants. I’d just take it as being a reflection of your current circumstances and where the most available pathways for achieving success exist currently.
Obviously, join a party and get involved in building the movement to develop yourself ideologically etc. etc. but also don’t waste time worrying about this experience. If you were living under feudalism you’d probably have aspired to marry above your station to a lord or lady to join the landed gentry but instead you had an expression of petit-bourgeois aspirations because we live under capitalism. It’s only when we have eradicated the material basis for the existence of the petit-bourgeoisie that we could expect to see petit-bourgeois aspirations like this withering on the vine, just like how marrying a dutchess or a viscount isn’t on your radar today.
I do organize and I think the more I’ve been doing that the more I realize how lib I actually am haha
That’s a really good sign tbh.
There’s a trap that you can fall into once you’re radicalised by assuming that since you’ve got the right position that therefore by extension there’s no longer a lib inside your head when really there’s a lib inside all of our heads and undoing a lifetime of liberal indoctrination is one major, ongoing project.
If you’re peeling back the layers of liberalism in yourself then it means that you’re moving in the right direction. Keep it up!