I’m curious how that could work. That peaks my interest because I’ve known people who have autism and seem great at socializing. I don’t have autism, but I’m very socially awkward, and if autistic people can do that I find it inspirational for my own socializing journey.
A podcaster on Radio Free Totebag casually said it, and idk if it was just as a passing joke, or if they were speaking factually. They mentioned a therapist not liking that they still say they’re autistic when it’s an old diagnosis.
Of course the dark side is that there’s a fine line between learning better social skills, and self-destructive masking.
I’ve hear of masking but I’m not clear on what it is. Can people without autism do masking? Or is it just people with autism?
Masking is the term for a neurodivergent person acting as if they are neurotypical. I’m sure there are some analogous behaviors for neurotypical people, but I don’t think they’re really quite the same thing, honestly.
Masking feels like making fun of NTs but none of them get the joke
Masking is a kind catch-all term for acting like a neurotypical person in social situations, in order to avoid social conflicts and misunderstandings. It’s exhausting. Imagine being an actor doing a live stage play all day without a break. After a long day at work pretending to be neurotypical to fit in, we need to go home and just shut out the world and recharge in safe solitude. There’s no energy left to do anything else. It’s not about trying to deceive neurotypical people with malicious intent. It’s just self-defence.
Autistic kids who aren’t on the severe end of the spectrum tend to subconsciously learn masking at a very early age. After decades of doing this every single day we often have no idea who we really are anymore. That’s why “unmasking” is so important for our mental health, even at the cost of one’s social standing or career prospects. We’re literally tired of literally acting. We just want to figure out who we really are, to be ourselves, to have society accept that, and for acquaintances and relatives and employers to make a few simple accommodations (like not springing unexpected short-notice same-day social event invitations on us) that would make our lives much less stressful.
There are many types of masking, I can only really attest to two: masking so people don’t notice I’m neurodivergent, and one that many of us are familiar with, “professional” masking, where you put on your workplace attitude, laboring with a smile when supervisors are near etc, or dealing with customers in customer service etc, this is a “mask” you are forced to wear as you perform your duty
Similarly for people like me, I have to perform being ‘normal’ on top of that, otherwise it causes issues because of the societal expectations we live in with this late stage capitalist hellworld
Thats how I think about it anyway