I’m not sure I should start this conversation and I’ve been rewriting this a lot lol. But I could use some relating and opinions from fellow internet leftists

Ok so, to keep it really simple: I happened to share a meal with somebody I really liked. I have interacted casually (no flirting) for about a dozen minutes total and we exchanged contact because of shared-interests (not dating)

Now my brain is fried

I’m thinking about her way too much and it gives be bad vibes, she probably has no idea and I can’t imagine the sheer horror of realising that someone is thinking this much about you after so little interaction.

I want to be a well-behaved straight (kinda bi but that’s beyond the point) guy, I’m trying to be an ally to the feminist cause, so, failing this spectacularly at behaving normally in relation to women disgust me. I know I can’t remove the patriarchy from my body but I damn wish I could.

  • the_post_of_tom_joad [any, any]@hexbear.netEnglish
    19·
    2 months ago

    Think there’s about a billion songs describing what you’re feeling so i wouldn’t sweat it. If you’re worried about creeping and not talking you should go ahead and talk to her about your mutual shared interests and hang out as friends. She did give you her contact sooo

    Nothing creepy about sharing those interests over the phone or doing those things together. If you know now or find through time spent you like her romantically, then just be honest with her about those feelings and be fine with whatever her decision is.

    I mean of course that’s easy for me to say… but I’m trying to say strong feelings are normal and nothing to fear. Maybe don’t tell her about your obsessin’ till after you’re married tho

    hero-wink

    • lil_tank [any, he/him]@hexbear.netOPEnglish
      9·
      2 months ago

      Feels good to read comrade thanks!

      You’re right about friendship. I actually feel better around female friends! And I’m actually afraid I’ll ruin a potentially incredible friendship by being irredeemably inlove

      • TraschcanOfIdeology [they/them, comrade/them]@hexbear.netEnglish
        11·
        2 months ago

        And I’m actually afraid I’ll ruin a potentially incredible friendship by being irredeemably inlove

        This feeling passes if you allow it to pass, and to see the person as just that, a person, and a friend. I’ve found the more toxic kinds of crushes are the ones where you don’t actually spend time with the person being normal and being friends. Gotta let these things see through the end. Either you stay friends and the crush naturally subsides, or you realize you’re incompatible and kind of fall off, in my experience.

        • lil_tank [any, he/him]@hexbear.netOPEnglish
          8·
          2 months ago

          Okay you’re absolutely right. In fact thanks for reminding me that I’ve had a crush on one of my current best friend, as you can see I had forgotten it happened!