I returned to work from office a while back and it was really hard to keep up my social energy high enough. First day I did ok with the excitement of meeting new people aiding me but it was downhill ever since. Showing up to work is itself a huge chore, and the societal obligation to socialise with people at the workplace all the time, is even bigger chore.
For more context, I only used to maintain very small circle of people I talk to in my uni and college days. Ignoring others was kinda ok at that time but doesn’t seem like so here in corporate space.
Don’t get me wrong, I want to be more free and connect with more people and have bigger circles, I want to improve my social skills too. But at the same time, it very taxing and almost makes me to shut off myself and avoid going to places where people who recognise me.
I don’t. I’m one of two software people at a manufacturing company of 60-70 employees, so I just get to sit in the corner and do my work, then leave at the end of the day. Honestly the best part of my job.
I don’t.
Yeah, I regularly ignore people. Lol
I work in tech. I go to things but im a big nerd and you can tell us from the other folks for our lack of social skills but there are a lot of us and we still talk a bit we just aren’t outgoing. I make my appearance. Eat and talk a bit and leave at the earliest socially acceptable point which is usually after any kind of activity happens like a dinner or some entertainer or some corpo speech or whatever. Day to day I go to my cube when im in office and I do my work going to pick up refreshements or using the bathroom as needed and I either find a quite place to decompress at lunch or leave the office for lunch.
This is a trick question in my case. I have the energy but not the ability. My mind has no idea how to respond to things if those things don’t have a set answer, at least in time for the conversation to not be dead. So people don’t typically try with me.
I know it very well. In my experience the best way to coop with it, is by being open about that you have the need of loading social energy. Be sure to know how you best can get your social battery full again, so that they know, that you need thus break. In that way they will, (if they are good colleagues) not see it like you don’t like or want the people around you.
Be sure to know how you best can get your social battery full again
Yep that’s a thing I am trying to figure out too. As of now, I think my social energy levels are coinciding with my body energy levels, that is, right after I eat my breakfast or lunch.
I kind of just set the bar that “this” is the level of enthusiasm and energy you can expect from me – I’m not a cheerleader.
Improving your social skills is a valid goal. But in the context of a workplace – make sure it’s aligned. Will people listen to you and your guidance on a project? Have you built up enough rapport to delegate or assign work? Etc.
But in the context of a workplace – make sure it’s aligned.
Oh if it’s work related, I’d be more than happy to talk.
In my post I am talking about the interactions we are forced to have during the breaks. And people don’t like you talking about work during break too. At times, wish I could disappear during breaks. This is why wfh is so much better.
If possible - feel free to go on walks by yourself during breaks or go listen/watch something under a tree nearby but out of sight. Maybe find a coworker or two to go on walks with you.
You don’t have to go 100% social or antisocial - but maybe sprinkling in one or the other could help re-energize.
I typically have on-sites once a quarter and 4 days of meetings and dinners can be quite a swing from my usual remote hermit lifestyle. In addition to sporadic walk breaks between meetings, I will try to duck out an hour or two before we all go out for dinner – my coworkers are pretty understanding that I’m using this time to recharge or run/workout.
Practice and don’t overstress yourself early.
Take breaks from people.
Try to schedule your social time.