• Łumało [he/him]@lemmygrad.mlEnglish
    38·
    3 months ago

    A lot of my comrades have been hatching recently, and I’m just like “You go girl/dude”. I’m going to be the only cis dude left someday lol

  • Babs [she/her]@hexbear.netEnglish
    28·
    3 months ago

    Shout-out to Actual Cis People (people who have actually interrogated their gender and determined that the one assigned at birth is actually pretty cool)

    Till then they’re just an egg. Or a cis-egg.

        • Cowbee [he/him, they/them]@hexbear.netEnglish
          2·
          3 months ago

          Idk, I’ve lived my life as cishet and plan on marrying my current partner, I’ve accepted that I’m actually closer to pan than I am to het but it feels like stolen valor to try to claim that, especially as a cracker.

          It feels like it might be more effective to my queer comrades for me to defend them as a cishet ally than risk feeding ammo otherwise.

          This is a subject I am terribly ill-informed on and would love any input from queer comrades.

          • SuperZutsuki [they/them]@hexbear.netEnglish
            3·
            3 months ago

            If you’re pan, you’re pan. Doesn’t matter if your current relationship is straight-presenting. Doesn’t matter if you get married and stay with her your whole life. I knew I was pan but refused to say anything about it to anyone for a very long time because I was in an ostensibly hetero relationship. It just felt worse and worse until I couldn’t hold it in anymore. There are MANY queer people who know and aren’t out to anyone. I wouldn’t be out if not for all the lovely people on here. Bi/pan erasure is real and damaging, don’t erase yourself because you don’t want to rock the boat. Does your partner know?

            • Cowbee [he/him, they/them]@hexbear.netEnglish
              2·
              3 months ago

              Yea, she knows, she’s pan herself (actually prefers women generally, haha, funny how we worked out). I think a large part of my struggle is growing up in an incredibly homophobic environment and constantly being called “gay” for having any effeminate traits, despite being a cis-male, and my personal failure to fully confront that internalized homophobia. It’s something I’m trying to work on.

              Thanks for the perspective!

  • iridaniotter [she/her]@hexbear.netEnglish
    22·
    3 months ago

    No, if someone is probably trans you gently breach the subject with them. You don’t “refuse to interfere.” That’s ridiculous and harmful.

  • Azarova [they/them]@hexbear.netEnglish
    221·
    3 months ago

    Hot take but the “egg prime directive” is harmful. If someone might be trans, I dont see any reason not to help them navigate the process of interrogating their gender. Worst case being they remain cis with a deeper understanding of themselves and gender, and hopefully come out the other side with less blindspots about the trans experience? Every cis person should go through that imho. Worst case for the egg prime directive is that a trans person goes a significantly longer time before realizing transitioning would greatly benefit their life, which we all know the perils of.

    • Gay_Tomato [they/them, it/its]@hexbear.netEnglish
      13·
      3 months ago

      I think this nonsense assumes it would be just as hurtful to imply someone might be trans as to tell a trans person they are cis. This feels like a “racism against white people kind take at best.”

      • Chronicon [comrade/them]@hexbear.netEnglish
        12·
        3 months ago

        I don’t think thats where everyone/most people are coming from with the prime directive stuff. But I agree its harmful. there’s not like, heavily pushing people or like trying to convince them, that’s normal to avoid, but being like ‘imma not even mention transness or talk about my own experience or make any suggestions to help this obvious egg’ which is just ass