The fascist Danish People’s Party are tilting, not at windmills but at minarets.

The islamophobic hate group is now proposing to ban adhans, public Muslim calls to prayer, a virtually non-existing phenomenon in the Nordic hermit kingdom. To the fascist far right, the mere thought of Muslims hypothetically existing in public space is problem enough.

The fact that prayer calls doesn’t happen and wouldn’t harm anyone if they did does not deter the fascists from complaining about “disrupting, loud calls to prayer”. “I don’t want to listen to that unbearable wailing! Ban it!” thundered enraged fascist candidate Rune Højer on Facebook. Later, when pressed by state broadcaster DR he admitted that he had, in fact, never heard a Muslim prayer call himself.

The proposal is part of what the Danish People’s Party calls a “remigration and repatriation plan,” openly using neo-Nazi terminology for their modern set of Nuremberg laws.

Højer justifies this proposed ban on something that does not happen with a slippery-slope argument: once you could not buy Ramadan decorations in Danish supermarkets, he explains, but now you can. Perhaps, Højer warns, the same fate awaits prayer calls if they are not banned in time. The horror is left implicit but understood: Denmark might, through sheer negligence, come to resemble a place where Muslims feel welcome.

The islamophobic hardliner Rasmus Stoklund, who heads the fledgling nation’s Social Democrat-controlled Ministry of Integration, has previously investigated similar bans, declaring the adhan “annoying” and insisting that “Denmark must never come to resemble the Middle East.”

The Danish People’s Party will not rest until ever Muslim has been removed from Danish soil. Recently, they made a bet reduction in the Muslim population an irrevocable demand for supporting savvy governing coalition and their immigration spokesperson has openly declared that he wants to make it “close to impossible to live an islamic life in Denmark”.

Alex Vanopslagh, leader of the far-right Liberal Alliance, has experienced a road-to-Damascus moment, conveniently timed for the upcoming election.

In 2023, Vanopslagh advocated for allowing “grown men who have their life together” to purchase cocaine from pharmacies, complete with quality controls and consumer information. Confronted with these statements now, he visibly squirmed and recanted. He regrets ever supporting legalization. Personal freedom, it emerges, has its limits.

True liberty, the Liberal Alliance has clarified, consists primarily of tax avoidance for the wealthy, not the radical notion that adults, regardless of gender, might decide what substances enter their own bodies.

Not to be outflanked on the racist far right, Prime Minister Mette Frederiksen’s Social Democrats have dialed up the racist vice signalling and unveiled what they proudly call “the toughest deportation policy in Europe”, seemingly based on the general assumption that Denmark’s problem is insufficient cruelty toward foreigners.

The centerpiece of the plan is removing due process for deportations. Under the Social Democrats’ proposal, administrative authorities, not independent courts, would decide who gets expelled from the country. The Social Democrats also propose denying non-emergency healthcare to anyone convicted of violence against medical staff, openly framing it as an immigration policy and expecting the healthcare exclusion to primarily target “people with a background in the Greater Middle East”.

She bets that the majority of Danes are as virulently racist as she is, and “dares to eat her old grandfather’s reed hat” on the assumption that most people will support her proposal.

The Danish Nurses’ Organization and the Danish Medical association have protested against the proposal as it violates the Hipocratic oath and exposes them to potentially dangerous situations. But why let such niceties interfere with a good purge?

“Denmark’s Funniest Man says yes,” wrote Social Democrat minister of housing Sophie Hæstorp Andersen on social media, telling her folllowers that the comedian Anders Matthesen supports the Social Democrat proposal of introducing a tiny wealth tax on the very rich. The islamophobic hardline and minister of immigration Rasmus Stoklund made similar claims.

The only problem is that this is not what the comedian thinks. He simply made a vague milquetoast statment about accepting the democratic process even if you disagree with the outcome. Matthesen has since made it abundantly clear that he resents being cast as a supporting character in Social Democratic propaganda without his consent. “Fuck, you’re disgusting with your gross tricks. I’m 100% not voting for you,” the comedian declared in a video, asking: “Are you fucking influencers or what the hell is happening?”

The misrepresentation is part of a broader pattern of politicians helpfully volunteering celebrities for their campaigns without the tedious formality of asking first.

The Social Democrats had to remove posts using Birthe Kjær’s 1980s Eurovision hit “Vi maler byen rød” after she protested. The fascist Denmark Democrats also got accused of abusing Danish artists after using imagery plagiarizing the rap group Suspekt

The fascist Denmark Democrats have identified the true threat to rural Denmark: solar panels.

Under the leadership of convicted criminal Inger Støjberg the party has launched a crusade against what she terms “iron fields” and are now proposing to make it easier for disgruntled neighbours to block solar farm projects. The party has distributed signs reading “Yes to grain fields, no to iron fields” and made promises to stop the “bulldozing” of rural communities.

The Denmark Democrats’ concern for neighborly relations is touching, if selective. While solar farms apparently require immediate legislative protection for nearby residents, factory hog farms and their accompanying slurry tanks - actual sources of pollution, odor, and environmental degradation—are “a different matter,” something you just have to put up with if you live in the countryside. The Denmark Democrats’ environmental sensitivity extends precisely to the point where it might inconvenience industrial agriculture, and not one step further.

A recent survey found that most Danes do not share Støjberg’s obsession with solar farms and they would rather live next to solar cells than to pig farms. In fact, solar panels ranked near the bottom of the “worst neighbors” list, below grocery stores, major roads, kindergartens, and even churches. Pig farms, meanwhile, ranked significantly higher as undesirable neighbors.