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segfault11 [she/her, any]@hexbear.net to Slop.@hexbear.netEnglish · 6 months ago

"no straight dude eats like this, at all"

hexbear.net

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"no straight dude eats like this, at all"

hexbear.net

segfault11 [she/her, any]@hexbear.net to Slop.@hexbear.netEnglish · 6 months ago
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  • Horse {they/them}@lemmygrad.ml
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    6 months ago

    fellas, is it gay to eat food?

    • SacredExcrement [any, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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      6 months ago

      Real men eat out of a trough

      • Guamer [she/her]@hexbear.net
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        6 months ago

        My snout descends

      • Le_Wokisme [they/them, undecided]@hexbear.net
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        6 months ago

        real men also pee in a trough at the football stadium

        • Thordros [he/him, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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          6 months ago

          My snout descends

      • CliffordBigRedDog [he/him]@hexbear.net
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        6 months ago

        feral-hog

    • InevitableSwing [none/use name]@hexbear.net
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      6 months ago

      Men stopped being men the moment Henry II started to use a fork.

    • SorosFootSoldier [he/him, they/them]@hexbear.net
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      6 months ago

      Oh but I do the soylent I’M the soyboy beta sjw cuck? I tells ya, I can’t win.

  • mickey [he/him]@hexbear.net
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    6 months ago

    Me, a stable heterosexual seeing a 20 year-old man posing over his grand slam flappy jack’s at Denny’s: “You know that boy ready to slang dick on the DL”

  • Esoteir [he/him]@hexbear.net
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    6 months ago

    eats gayly

    • huf [he/him]@hexbear.net
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      6 months ago

      i mean, eating involves shoving stuff down your throat in a very slimy manner. it’s super gay, basically. no gasoline is involved normally, if you can believe it! mindboggling!

    • SovietBeerTruckOperator@hexbear.net
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      6 months ago

      Nick whenever he see Adam eat anything

  • WhatDoYouMeanPodcast [comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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    6 months ago

    Heterosexuality is the only sexuality you have to earn and maintain. It can’t just be maintained personally, it has to be enforced. That makes it overseen and enforced by cringers. Otherwise known as the Cringlerarchy

    • huf [he/him]@hexbear.net
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      6 months ago

      masculinity must be constantly patrolled
      femininity must be constantly performed

      otherwise bicycle train society collapse gay gay asian frothingfash

      • WhatDoYouMeanPodcast [comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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        6 months ago

        What is a man? A miserable pile of Asian? Have at you!

    • lilypad [pup/pup's, it/its]@hexbear.net
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      6 months ago

      Kris Kringlearchy kelly

  • happybadger [he/him]@hexbear.net
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    6 months ago

    Scanning the Denny’s for threats, holding my emotional support gun for safety, desperately trying to show everyone that I’m eating HETEROSEXUALLY.

    • SorosFootSoldier [he/him, they/them]@hexbear.net
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      6 months ago

      It must be hell to be a chud who’s obsessed with performative masculinity, can’t even let your guard down for a second and be normal for once.

    • copandballtorture [ey/em]@hexbear.net
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      6 months ago

      Specifying NO STRAW with your drink because putting something in your mouth and sucking it is gay

    • MolotovHalfEmpty [he/him]@hexbear.net
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      6 months ago

      You must assert dominance in a Denny’s, just like Tom Brokaw did.

      Do you think it’s a coincidence that that same morning I woke up from that dream about the international banking conspiracy, and the space aliens that fed me pancakes with no syrup or butter… That same morning Tom Brokaw went into a Denny’s restaurant, poured ketchup on his penis, and ran around screaming “Who wants a real grand slam breakfast?!”

      • HexReplyBot [none/use name]@hexbear.netB
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        6 months ago

        I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy:

        • yewtu.be
        • inv.nadeko.net
        • yt.artemislena.eu
        • piped.video
  • came_apart_at_Kmart [he/him, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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    6 months ago

    straight dudes only eat while sitting in the driver seat of their pickup truck with their shades on on their way to CHURCH to GET RIGHT with THE LORD.

    • segfault11 [she/her, any]@hexbear.netOP
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      6 months ago

      “getting right” with another man???

      • underisk [none/use name]@hexbear.net
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        6 months ago

        well they certainly wouldn’t be getting left.

  • segfault11 [she/her, any]@hexbear.netOP
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    6 months ago

    this sort of thing isn’t even new tbh. the first time I ever encountered the word “soyboy” was back during the 2017 Texas church shooting, where the shooter turned out to be an ex military, overly divorced white man instead of an arab or SJW or someone else who would have been convenient for their narratives. the guy also happened to be a bit chubby with soft facial features, and with that alone “people” on 4chan decided he’s a soyboy and therefore left leaning in some way.

  • Skeleton_Erisma [they/them, any]@hexbear.net
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    6 months ago

    AI pfp says the most bewildering shit day: 51359823405812309850243985

  • peeonyou [he/him]@hexbear.net
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    6 months ago

    Expert analysis identifies this squiggle here as the manifestation of the queer gene. Thank you for your attention to this matter.

    • ThermonuclearEgg@hexbear.net
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      6 months ago

      3Blue1Brown pi creature

  • NedIsakoff [he/him]@hexbear.net
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    6 months ago

    Moving ever closer to a bit I once had about someone who thinks it’s gay to have a man cook for you so he doesn’t go out to restaurants just in case.

  • RoabeArt [he/him]@hexbear.net
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    6 months ago

    Hey fellas is it gay to not pick up food and eat it with your bare hands?

    • SorosFootSoldier [he/him, they/them]@hexbear.net
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      6 months ago

      Remember these knuckle draggers are supposed to be the paragons of “Western Society” and yet here they are dragging this kid for using a fork and a knife correctly. Make up your fucking minds you hypocrite freaks!

  • SnuggleButt [he/him]@hexbear.netBanned
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    6 months ago

    Dude, he’s just thin and lanky not gay. Brother has long limbs and can’t fit in the booth. You cannot convince me any of these people ever go outside

  • SovietBeerTruckOperator@hexbear.net
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    6 months ago

    Straight men only eat waffles, pancakes are gay!

    • SorosFootSoldier [he/him, they/them]@hexbear.net
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      6 months ago

      gayroller-2000 on my way to eat some cakes.

      • 30_to_50_Feral_PAWGs [she/her]@hexbear.net
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        6 months ago

           speech-bottom
        thicc-trumpxok

  • robotElder2 [he/him]@hexbear.net
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    6 months ago

    OH what, too good to eat from a trough? Don’t want your widdle fingeys to get dirty? Why? so you can finger a dude?

  • tamagotchicowboy [he/him]@hexbear.net
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    6 months ago

    Unless you shove the food down your gullet with unwashed hands in a single bite its gay, also the food has to look like literal slop or its pretty and therefore gay. Utensils? Gay. Restaurants? Homosexual. Anything you can’t eat with your bare hands in one bite, not straight.

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