Erika3sis [she/her, xe/xem]

“I am reckoned a horrid brute because I had not been cowardly enough to lie down for them under such trying circumstances, and insults to my people.” - Ned Kelly

Any pronouns but he/they, unless you buy me dinner first.

  • 785 Posts
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Joined 3 years ago
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Cake day: August 18th, 2023

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  • Back when I was still an anarchist I had a dream about commandeering a tank and using it to dispel a group of neo-Nazis. I relayed this dream to a liberal[1] I knew, who called my behavior in the dream “tankie”. I thought but didn’t say, “What, so would you have preferred me to just do nothing and let those neo-Nazis go around chanting hate slogans and intimidating immigrants?”

    That interaction was pretty formative for me, I think, because after that I pretty much stopped taking the word “tankie” seriously whenever I heard it; because if an anarchist in a dream, breaking the law and acting in an individual capacity to dispel full-on “blood and soil” neo-Nazis, could be called a “tankie” by someone who isn’t even a revolutionary leftist; then surely anyone can be called a tankie by anyone else for any reason. All that “tankie” really seems to mean is “leftist who Does Stuff” — because leaving a mark on the world means pushing your hand into the clay, applying force, one might even say — gasp! — imposing authority. “Have these gentlemen ever seen a” yadda yadda yadda. I also once heard someone else say “better to do no wrong than do something right” to describe the sort of thinking that leads people to call other people “tankies”: it’s a very Christian sort of mindset, you know, just one of a series of words for “leftist I don’t like”.

    Now personally, I call leftists I don’t like “yahoos”, and the truth is that every single leftist on the planet is at least a little yahooish: you’re a yahoo if you support China too much; you’re also a yahoo if you support China too little; and I’m a yahoo for not knowing what the right amount of support for China is, even though I am not and will never be in any sort of position where my opinion on China will even remotely matter to the historical development of our planet; and my actual contribution to The Revolution™ will only ever be a very China-unrelated microscopic drop in the bucket.

    As for how I abandoned anarchism, which some might say is when I “truly became a tankie”: it just made an intuitive sort of sense to me that history is a series of forces being metaphorically “persistence-hunted” by other forces. So learning about dialectics and historical materialism and whatnot didn’t really feel like abandoning anarchism so much as it felt like a new understanding of strategy, that anarchism / abolition of the state / communism as a historical force is not yet strong enough to win, but it can become strong enough if the currently stronger forces get to duke it out first and become tired enough for abolition of the state to persistence-hunt. Which means that my goal as an actor however small in the historical process should be to hasten that battle.


    1. A liberal as in someone who’s neither an anarchist nor ML nor in any way a revolutionary leftist; someone with complete faith in the electoral system who’d “Vote Blue No Matter Who”; you get the picture. ↩︎






  • Thank you for your encyclopedic knowledge of Pretty Cure and very good knowledge of magical girls and anime girls in general. I did start reading the Esperanto translation of the Mermaid Melody: Pichi Pichi Pitch Aqua manga a while ago but I guess the character design didn’t leave a lasting impression. Full Moon O Sagashite is apparently on my PTW; I knew it was familiar but I couldn’t find it no matter what I searched, but I guess I should’ve just searched my PTW to begin with. Fine and Rein were two characters I was particularly curious about just because they stand out as having particularly cute designs in the fanart. And of course the qipao-wearing odango-head is called “Meirin” — that’s like a whole trope, isn’t it? That every Chinese girl in anime is called Meiling.

    I can only assume that the ones I could identify were all ones you were already familiar with, too.

    So, the following ten characters remain unidentified:

    Broom riders: left two

    Top row: center

    Fourth row: left of center, right of center, fourth from right

    Fifth row: far right, second from left, center

    Bottom row: second from right



  • I feel like I should mention that this “Habibi Che” dream also involved:

    1. Me learning about some sort of referendum in Gaza following the Battle of Gaza in 2007;[1]
    2. Some sort of ripoff of SCP-035 going around killing people in my local area;[2]
    3. A false awakening immediately followed by grotesque eye-related body horror;[3]
    4. Some really weird pregnancy fetish stuff right at the end.[4]

    So like……… Do you really want to spend a day in my brain? I mean, I won’t stop you, but you’re gonna see some shit, is all I’m saying.


    1. There is unfortunately no shortage of reasons to have dreams involving Gaza. ↩︎

    2. Probably because I recently bought a creepy white mask that bears an extremely passing resemblance to SCP-035. ↩︎

    3. Probably because I’ve been thinking about the Grenadian Revolution lately, and a popular Grenadian song from that era called “Human Rights” has a reference to Matthew 7:3 in it: “before you try to take the mote out of your brother’s eye, you have to first let the beam out of your own” ↩︎

    4. Maybe because I’ll soon be hosting a watch party for a drama miniseries in which a character getting caught looking at preggo porn is a major plot point; maybe because I’ve been thinking about Missy R. distancing herself from Tokyo Fetish Mew as an example of self-crit and personal growth; or maybe it’s just that various vaguely pregnancy and/or fetish related things just coalesced like that. Probably all three! You know how dreams are. ↩︎

















  • I’m taking “new music” to mean “any music you haven’t heard before”, so I’ll mention these YouTube channels:

    • Harakiri Diat uploads a lot of recently-released songs and albums in punk and punk-adjacent genres.
    • Ultradiskopanorama uploads a lot of old and obscure disco, funk, synthpop and similar, particularly from the Eastern Bloc and Asia.
    • Peđa Radović uploads a lot of old music from Yugoslavia.
    • Music Ocean uploads retro albums, mostly from the USSR.
    • Planet ASE (formerly “Are Sounds Electrik?”) uploads obscure electronica-type music and other curiosities, most of it old but some of it new.
    • KEXP uploads a lot of live performances by music acts that are niche, maybe up-and-coming or maybe already popular in their country of origin.
    • THE FIRST TAKE uploads a lot of live performances of J-pop and anison.

    There’s also the ol’ reliable of just listening to the radio. Or rather, I use a program on my computer called Shortwave to listen to radio stations from around the world. My go-to is РадиоRadio КавказKavkaz ХитHit (https://kavkazhit.hostingradio.ru:8017/kavkazhit96.mp3), which Shortwave calls an “orphaned station”. I can still listen to it without issue but I guess “orphaned” means that if I were to delete Радио Кавказ Хит from my library then I won’t be able to add it back. Радио Кавказ Хит is based in Southern Russia (Northern Caucasus) and plays pretty much exclusively folk pop from that part of the world, in any case. The cool thing about Shortwave is that it records all the songs you hear, so you can easily download them.