This is a party for only the toughest men. Cowboys, Construction workers, Cops, Leather Bound Bikers, Native Warriors, and Sailors. No girl stuff. Just sweaty men being sweaty with eachother.
18 naked cowboys in the showers at Ram Ranch
I maybe non binary but my boyfriend says I look and dress masculine so
I’m getting that free ass beer
If heterosexuality was a beer 😂😂😂
What if we had “ladies night” but for the fellas?
Thinking back to when i asked my dad why i only see signs for ladies night but not boys night.
I wish i could remember how he explained to me that ladies night actually IS boy’s night; because i didn’t make the “free/cheap drinks means the women are more drunk and open to advances” connection until much later
“The only way these women will tolerate our presence is if we give them free booze.”
Although it was funny going to an engineering school and having super cool female roommates who would go to “ladies nights” with us and go order 6 $2 mixed drinks every 15 minutes.
The more generous interpretation is that because the women are gone, the men are now “unshackled” and can grill and watch the big game without the dang old lady nagging about dishes
You would get a bunch of dudes stopping by for a beer before leaving to find ladies.
showing up in dirty overalls for my one (1) free beer and then going to the better bar across town to actually spend my money
Shotgunning my free natty light then removing my coveralls to reveal a rainbow speedo
This is almost the Party Boy bit from Jackass
Yeah and while it would be very visually funny to watch me do it, I’m not about to do this in the US where as far as my outside perspective is concerned, i would die instantly
well it’s America so obviously your rainbow speedo would need to have a belly band holster belt holding up your shiny chrome FREEDOM EQUALIZER .45 AARP caliber sidearm
I try to do a bit in America and am instantly shot dozens of times from multiple angles
It’s Idaho, so you’re probably surrounded by neo-Nazis and Klansmen as soon as you set foot in the bar
Mormons too, but maybe that’s redundant
And an unhealthy smattering of Witnesses to boot
oh man now I’m imagining bib overalls with buttons up the sides of the legs like those rip-off trainer pants
This is what I and every person I willingly drink with would do.
“Thanks fuck you, see you tomorrow. Can’t wait for you to have to explain what about my attire isn’t straight so you’re not running up against false advertising claims by not giving us a free beer everyday.”
Also this really seems like about the easiest slam dunk ever for discrimination against a protected class but I assume lgbtq people aren’t a protected class in whatever windswept sithole this is in.
I think federally at least sexuality is a protected characteristic, but I don’t think the courts in Idaho would respect that so you’d need to have the funds to appeal it up a few levels
Btw the ruling to make sexuality a protected characteristic was an incredibly rare Gorsuch W where he ruled that discriminating based off of sexual orientation was discriminating based off of sex (i.e. if you refuse service to Jim because Jim dates Bob, but you wouldn’t refuse service to Jane because Jane dates Bob, then that’s implicitly discrimination based off of sex)
Nothing straighter than a bar full of dudes aggressively asserting that they 100% STRAIGHT NO GAYS ALLOWED
And determining that by judging the outfit of every guy that walks in.
spits dip into spitoon “Them jeans boot cut or straight fit feller?”
… Straight fit?
That’s gotta be the answer they’re looking for, right?
What’s a heterosexual? Never heard of one.
Person who is sexually attracted to Greek hetairas?
idaho is still so fukken mad it wasn’t even a state during the civil war so it could join the south
Bi invisibility finally a superpower. Just gotta keep the finger guns holstered.
no problemo!
… wait shit
The ladies can just sit and watch all the fellas have a good time.
I wonder how many cis men get turned away for being too feminine
If you don’t have your lower and upper lip fully packed with tobacco while actively going to chemo for mouth cancer, you’re too queer for hetero Monday.
Packing dip until my mouth protrudes like Homer Simpson
Cishet femboys are the most oppressed class
Go Woke or Go Broke
Old State Saloon: We’re gonna give away free beer to dudes!
CW: Vaguely penis shaped object
That’s obviously a flexing bicep
Well yeah I thought it looked like a dick, but then I thought “what could be more masculine than that?”
why are there quotes around “alcohol”, that makes me nervous…
How are we doin’ fellow heterosexuals? Enjoying playing dress up and the free beer?
White ppl celebrating HAM, heard that one before
It’s about time for the straight fellas to get some recognition